July 19th 2009 8 PM
The Living Room NYC
From Leif Arntzen
To: Friends Of Scotty Hard
Dear Friends
Last month Scotty and I went to a disability exposition in Raritan, South Jersey. He was interested to see the state-of-the-art wheelchairs and beds for people with spinal chord injuries. We looked at dozens of wheelchairs, beds, aids, wheels, frames, from all kinds of manufacturers, and pretty soon I got the hang of talking with the salespeople, many in wheelchairs themselves, hawking their products. Scott talked in detail with all the guys, but with one guy in particular. He was in a chair -- called the TiLite ZR -- that was clearly lighter and more streamlined than the rest, with the least moving parts, and some features that really could make wheelchair travel in NYC faster and safer. TiLite is a manufacturer based in Washington State that specializes in titanium, manual wheelchairs. As they say on their website (www.tilite.com), their chairs are designed to "help users remain independent longer, experience reduced body stress, and incur fewer posture-related problems."
Scott's current chair seems like a rusty old tank compared to the TiLite. We went to a local diner and got an insanely huge corn beef sandwich to split. Scott asked me what I thought. I said, "Well, I think if it was me, I'd be looking for the best wheelchair I could find, so I could get where I need to go." He called me a couple weeks later to see if I thought it was a good idea to get that chair. "Absolutely. What are we waiting for?"
Here are some of the specific benefits of the TiLite:
- it is almost 40 lbs. lighter than his present model
- it provides a much smoother and faster ride because the tires are air-filled and don't have deep, biting treads
- the rigid frame is ergonomically designed to absorb bumps
- he will sit lower, which will allow better access under tables and through doorways and gives better position for propulsion
- the larger wheels also give better propulsion
- the lighter weight and easy collapseability allows for convenient car travel, which in turn
makes it easier for him to be more spontaneous about travelling and not so tied to the slow and unpredictable Access-a-Ride
Unfortunately, the TiLite costs a lot of money, a big hit to the Trust Fund. So I told Scott we should start a Wheelchair Drive to raise the funds. So friends, here's the first WheelChair Drive to help pay for it. Whatever you can manage to send will be huge. On July 19th, we'll stage a concert in NYC specifically for this purpose, and dedicate all the money to help finance the TiLite ZR. The concert will include Brad Roberts, Seth Herzog, the Reverend Vince Anderson, Gachupin, Not Waving But Drowning, Mike Ferrio of Tandy, Chris Brown, Leif Arntzen of TLAB, Michael Blake, and an extended cast of your favorite musicians. Plus a very special guest star performance by none other then Scotty Hard, the Comeback Kid. If you can come, the concert will be a blast. If not, please send what you can.Here's the links to buy tickets in advance:HardFolks Concert: WheelChair Drive Or if you prefer to donate direct to the Scotty Hard Trust click here:Scotty Hard Trust Or if you prefer to donate by cheque, mail to:Heesok ChangTrustee, Scotty Hard Trust970 Kent Ave #401Brooklyn, NY 11205
So that's the pitch my friends. See you at the concert. And thanks for all your donations.
xoxo
Leif
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Brother Mike chimes in with an update for 2009.
Greetings friends of Scotty Hard, aka Scott Harding.
It is amazing what a difference a day made, in the words of Dinah Washington. And it is amazing what love and friendship can do in a simple year's time. And it is humbling to know what we cannot do.
And through all of this, we continue to marvel at the man himself, and how he chooses to live his life.
No is not an option.
Scotty Hard is made of Hard stock; anyone who has met his father, and had the opportunity to enjoy his mother, or the equally talented brothers, Mike and Brian, know the Hardings are a special stock.
In this time of bailouts and stimulus packages, it is inspiring to know that we can all be stimulated by the gift of friendship.
Love to Scott, Mike, and all Hardstockers.
Dennis
http://www.densemilt.com/http://www.holyhardstock.com/http://www.workhardprayhardscottyhard.com/
----- Original Message -----
From: Tom Camuso
To: Leif Arntzen
Sent: Sunday, February 15, 2009 11:44 AM
Subject: 2009 Update from Mike
Dear Friends of Scott,
About a month before Christmas, Scott made the unexpected decision to come to Vancouver for the holiday, after we had realized that there was really no place where the four of us (Scott, Dad, Brian and I) could spend it together in NYC. Very fortunately, Heesok was also visiting so Scott got the same flights and had a much needed travel companion. I had not seen him since August at Mom's funeral and I was looking very much forward to seeing for myself how his life has progressed since leaving Beth Abraham Rehab Centre on September 5th. Since then Scott has been living in his own apartment in Bedford-Stuyvesant in Brooklyn in the same building as his good friends Joel and Rachel and not far from Heesok and Carrie.
Being in his own place for the first time since the accident in February was always going to present new and difficult challenges. The change from institutional living would not be easy or simple. Managing dozens of everyday tasks from a wheelchair, with only the use of your body from the mid-chest upwards... During this transitional time, before he can live fully independent, Scott has four full-time, around the clock home health aides (they work in 2 12 hour shifts per day) to help him with household tasks, dressing, showering, turning him over every two hours at night, accompanying him to therapy and doctors appointments and other things.
So after a lot of preplanning with Scott, scouting suitable accommodation, booking and hiring a home-care worker, gathering supplies and other logistical things, Brian and I picked Scott and Heesok up in the middle of Vancouver's worst snowstorm in (30?) years at 1am on Dec.22. For Scott to get around requires more planning and consideration than just, 'We'll pull up'. First you have to find an area that he can even get up to and of course at the airport the snowplows had just pushed massive piles of snow from the road up all over the "Handicapped Loading Area", rendering it utterly useless, which any person with an ounce of brain matter could easily have figured out as they were doing it. So we have to park in a bus zone and get yelled and screamed at by the 'parking diva' until she sees this guy in wheelchair and then shuts up... Find just the right spot and angle, maneuver the chair into position, everything has to be all lined up just so, and then he can do the transfer into the vehicle, fold the chair up into the trunk and then you go. Then of course it all happens in reverse when you get there. My Dad's place would be have been totally inaccessible to Scott but for us serendipitously receiving a motorized stairway-chair from a family friend who passed away. And here too it's an equally involved scene as the one for the car.
Just getting around takes up a huge amount of Scott's time and energy. Going for the 'convenience' of the wheelchair cab isn't always the better alternative either. Vancouver cab drivers couldn't miss an opportunity to shame themselves in this painfully prolonged run-up to our "Great International Showcase". (Hey, I'm sure taxi companies are huge supporters of the Paralympic games). A bunch of us involved in the Hardstock Benefit shows gathered for a great lunch at Hy's downtown, organized by Dennis Mills. Afterwards Scott, Juliana and I tried some Christmas shopping in the snowy, messy downtown. To get home we waited over an hour and a half for a cab that - as far as we know - is still coming. Attempts at flagging just ended in drive-offs (is that a word?). Last option, we took the subway/skytrain (make sure the elevators are working!) and then literally 'plowed' our way through a few blocks of snow to get home. This kind of treatment was a revelation to me (maybe it shouldn't have been), but I guess it's reality when you are disabled; constant reminders that some people want to push you aside and forget about you. Scott has stories of being left at the side of the road, stranded(!), by Access-A-Ride, of their constant lateness or taking the wrong routes to his appointments and ending up in the wrong part of town. The good news is that Scott's gearing up to start taking the bus on his own soon. Small steps towards more independence!
Mobility in his own neighbourhood in Brooklyn is also far from ideal as the sidewalks are in poor condition and the ramps often not usable by wheelchairs, severely limiting his ability to get around. He's hopeful of moving to a new place in downtown Brooklyn where the streets are better maintained and lots of shops and other things are within easy 'wheeling-distance'. This potential new place is somewhat smaller but set up much better for wheelchair accessibility. Affordable, (wheelchair)-accessible places are not easy to come by. But even this, despite gargantuan month-long efforts - thanks to Carrie Goldberg, Lauren Hall and Cate Oberg for steering the application process - is far from certain to happen. For Scott it's just not as simple as: 'Hey, I think I'll move...there!'
All of these obstacles and more Scott is meeting with a kind of equanimity and poise that I could hardly imagine myself summoning were I in his place. Spending time in Scott's orbit you'll come to greatly admire, as have I, the quiet resolve he brings to this day-to-day struggle.
Scott, as ever (he hasn't changed in that way), prefers to dwell on what's positive in his life. So we talked about the new studio and the work that's gone into it (mostly done by the indefatigable Tom) to make it accessible for him; his successes at setting up a small but useful work space in his apartment and the good feeling of being able to do some work again. Of the joys of being able to see his many friends in his own surroundings, to cook dinners, watch TV and just hang out together. A huge and welcome change from previous. About the slow but steady progress he makes in his various rehab programs. He takes occupational therapy and physical therapy three times a week at NYU/RUSK as well as his own 'self-directed' weight-workouts in the gym at Heesok's building multiple times a week. Beginning in a couple of weeks he is starting tai chi classes. All that in addition to irregular doctor and social worker appointments for blood tests, check-ups, etc.
Just because he was in Vancouver, Scott decided that his traditional Boxing Day's Party shouldn't have to be cancelled. (Americans: What is this 'Boxing Day'?). Some used the weather as an excuse to jam out, those who didn't discovered what a a brilliant cook Brian is and a novel and potent concoction called 'Bushnog'. Scott was truly in his element here holding court before many dear and long unseen friends. Ya missed a great one.
For the next few months Scott wants to really concentrate on his health and his re-hab program. With the new studio in Greenpoint nearing completion there will a be chance to ease back into some part-time work, as it goes. Being with and around Scott on a daily basis for a full week really illuminated for me the grinding details of the life that's been cruelly imposed upon a totally innocent person. Living across the continent it can become all too easy to forget that he's now living on such a radically different level than ours. Brian, Dad and I want to acknowledge and thank the people (too many to name all) who have been so central in supporting Scott in the past year, especially: Tom, Leif, Christina, Heesok and Carrie, all of whom I've had the privilege of meeting and spending time with.
It's been almost a year since Scott's accident - but really this is just the beginning. There is still so far to go, so much to do, so many challenges to be met and overcome. I hope that all of you have a chance to be with Scott sometime soon and experience the dignity and courage he exhibits and with which he will ultimately conquer this enormous test. Scott truly values and needs all of our support, in whatever form or amount. Please go to the links if you want to contribute, organize a supper or just drop a line to say hello. Thanks to you all for keeping Scott in your thoughts this past year and I hope you'll continue to do so.
Mike Harding
http://www.scottyhardtrust.com/
http://www.scottyhardsuppers.com/
It is amazing what a difference a day made, in the words of Dinah Washington. And it is amazing what love and friendship can do in a simple year's time. And it is humbling to know what we cannot do.
And through all of this, we continue to marvel at the man himself, and how he chooses to live his life.
No is not an option.
Scotty Hard is made of Hard stock; anyone who has met his father, and had the opportunity to enjoy his mother, or the equally talented brothers, Mike and Brian, know the Hardings are a special stock.
In this time of bailouts and stimulus packages, it is inspiring to know that we can all be stimulated by the gift of friendship.
Love to Scott, Mike, and all Hardstockers.
Dennis
http://www.densemilt.com/http://www.holyhardstock.com/http://www.workhardprayhardscottyhard.com/
----- Original Message -----
From: Tom Camuso
To: Leif Arntzen
Sent: Sunday, February 15, 2009 11:44 AM
Subject: 2009 Update from Mike
Dear Friends of Scott,
About a month before Christmas, Scott made the unexpected decision to come to Vancouver for the holiday, after we had realized that there was really no place where the four of us (Scott, Dad, Brian and I) could spend it together in NYC. Very fortunately, Heesok was also visiting so Scott got the same flights and had a much needed travel companion. I had not seen him since August at Mom's funeral and I was looking very much forward to seeing for myself how his life has progressed since leaving Beth Abraham Rehab Centre on September 5th. Since then Scott has been living in his own apartment in Bedford-Stuyvesant in Brooklyn in the same building as his good friends Joel and Rachel and not far from Heesok and Carrie.
Being in his own place for the first time since the accident in February was always going to present new and difficult challenges. The change from institutional living would not be easy or simple. Managing dozens of everyday tasks from a wheelchair, with only the use of your body from the mid-chest upwards... During this transitional time, before he can live fully independent, Scott has four full-time, around the clock home health aides (they work in 2 12 hour shifts per day) to help him with household tasks, dressing, showering, turning him over every two hours at night, accompanying him to therapy and doctors appointments and other things.
So after a lot of preplanning with Scott, scouting suitable accommodation, booking and hiring a home-care worker, gathering supplies and other logistical things, Brian and I picked Scott and Heesok up in the middle of Vancouver's worst snowstorm in (30?) years at 1am on Dec.22. For Scott to get around requires more planning and consideration than just, 'We'll pull up'. First you have to find an area that he can even get up to and of course at the airport the snowplows had just pushed massive piles of snow from the road up all over the "Handicapped Loading Area", rendering it utterly useless, which any person with an ounce of brain matter could easily have figured out as they were doing it. So we have to park in a bus zone and get yelled and screamed at by the 'parking diva' until she sees this guy in wheelchair and then shuts up... Find just the right spot and angle, maneuver the chair into position, everything has to be all lined up just so, and then he can do the transfer into the vehicle, fold the chair up into the trunk and then you go. Then of course it all happens in reverse when you get there. My Dad's place would be have been totally inaccessible to Scott but for us serendipitously receiving a motorized stairway-chair from a family friend who passed away. And here too it's an equally involved scene as the one for the car.
Just getting around takes up a huge amount of Scott's time and energy. Going for the 'convenience' of the wheelchair cab isn't always the better alternative either. Vancouver cab drivers couldn't miss an opportunity to shame themselves in this painfully prolonged run-up to our "Great International Showcase". (Hey, I'm sure taxi companies are huge supporters of the Paralympic games). A bunch of us involved in the Hardstock Benefit shows gathered for a great lunch at Hy's downtown, organized by Dennis Mills. Afterwards Scott, Juliana and I tried some Christmas shopping in the snowy, messy downtown. To get home we waited over an hour and a half for a cab that - as far as we know - is still coming. Attempts at flagging just ended in drive-offs (is that a word?). Last option, we took the subway/skytrain (make sure the elevators are working!) and then literally 'plowed' our way through a few blocks of snow to get home. This kind of treatment was a revelation to me (maybe it shouldn't have been), but I guess it's reality when you are disabled; constant reminders that some people want to push you aside and forget about you. Scott has stories of being left at the side of the road, stranded(!), by Access-A-Ride, of their constant lateness or taking the wrong routes to his appointments and ending up in the wrong part of town. The good news is that Scott's gearing up to start taking the bus on his own soon. Small steps towards more independence!
Mobility in his own neighbourhood in Brooklyn is also far from ideal as the sidewalks are in poor condition and the ramps often not usable by wheelchairs, severely limiting his ability to get around. He's hopeful of moving to a new place in downtown Brooklyn where the streets are better maintained and lots of shops and other things are within easy 'wheeling-distance'. This potential new place is somewhat smaller but set up much better for wheelchair accessibility. Affordable, (wheelchair)-accessible places are not easy to come by. But even this, despite gargantuan month-long efforts - thanks to Carrie Goldberg, Lauren Hall and Cate Oberg for steering the application process - is far from certain to happen. For Scott it's just not as simple as: 'Hey, I think I'll move...there!'
All of these obstacles and more Scott is meeting with a kind of equanimity and poise that I could hardly imagine myself summoning were I in his place. Spending time in Scott's orbit you'll come to greatly admire, as have I, the quiet resolve he brings to this day-to-day struggle.
Scott, as ever (he hasn't changed in that way), prefers to dwell on what's positive in his life. So we talked about the new studio and the work that's gone into it (mostly done by the indefatigable Tom) to make it accessible for him; his successes at setting up a small but useful work space in his apartment and the good feeling of being able to do some work again. Of the joys of being able to see his many friends in his own surroundings, to cook dinners, watch TV and just hang out together. A huge and welcome change from previous. About the slow but steady progress he makes in his various rehab programs. He takes occupational therapy and physical therapy three times a week at NYU/RUSK as well as his own 'self-directed' weight-workouts in the gym at Heesok's building multiple times a week. Beginning in a couple of weeks he is starting tai chi classes. All that in addition to irregular doctor and social worker appointments for blood tests, check-ups, etc.
Just because he was in Vancouver, Scott decided that his traditional Boxing Day's Party shouldn't have to be cancelled. (Americans: What is this 'Boxing Day'?). Some used the weather as an excuse to jam out, those who didn't discovered what a a brilliant cook Brian is and a novel and potent concoction called 'Bushnog'. Scott was truly in his element here holding court before many dear and long unseen friends. Ya missed a great one.
For the next few months Scott wants to really concentrate on his health and his re-hab program. With the new studio in Greenpoint nearing completion there will a be chance to ease back into some part-time work, as it goes. Being with and around Scott on a daily basis for a full week really illuminated for me the grinding details of the life that's been cruelly imposed upon a totally innocent person. Living across the continent it can become all too easy to forget that he's now living on such a radically different level than ours. Brian, Dad and I want to acknowledge and thank the people (too many to name all) who have been so central in supporting Scott in the past year, especially: Tom, Leif, Christina, Heesok and Carrie, all of whom I've had the privilege of meeting and spending time with.
It's been almost a year since Scott's accident - but really this is just the beginning. There is still so far to go, so much to do, so many challenges to be met and overcome. I hope that all of you have a chance to be with Scott sometime soon and experience the dignity and courage he exhibits and with which he will ultimately conquer this enormous test. Scott truly values and needs all of our support, in whatever form or amount. Please go to the links if you want to contribute, organize a supper or just drop a line to say hello. Thanks to you all for keeping Scott in your thoughts this past year and I hope you'll continue to do so.
Mike Harding
http://www.scottyhardtrust.com/
http://www.scottyhardsuppers.com/
Saturday, January 3, 2009
We kept on rollin.......
Just before Christmas 2008, Scotty Hard returned to Vancouver. I had the privilege of taking him to a hockey game, where we got the Royal treatment in the box, and then a Vancouver's bums rush on curbside waiting for a handicab. Ran into Mr. Northey and Bentall though, so all was good. Next day, enjoyed my first facial and a steak and martini lunch at Hy's with the Hardstock steering committee. We had two important visitors from NY- Dr. Chang and Mr. Hard. Ok, maybe he isn't a doctor, but he can operate.Sampled the Bushnog at Harding house on Boxing Day, and was caught out playing Scrabble with the Maggot, Manny and the Mrs and little Alexandra. Icer and Drowners. And 2009? Happy Hardstock!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Table that Motion
last night I went with my family to a Scotty Hard Supper hosted by Margaret Gallagher, Omar and Angela Yan- I hope I got it right. The food was Indonesian-malaysian, satays, banana leafs, a multitude of condiments, wine and friends and friends to be all sitting round tables under tents in the rain. A perfect Vancouver moment. Margaret's friend, the bon vivant, Fred Lee was also present, taking pictures and notes in preparations for an article in the National Post (we hope).
The sax god Michael Blake performed in her living room with the unparelled Dylan van der Schyff (hope I spelled that right) on drums. All the proceeds go the Scotty Hard Trust, and talk is already focused on how to do it right when he returns for a Christmas family engagement.
I dream of Hardstock 09 at the Commodore ( of course) with Scott himself on the snake guitar.
Michael's playing was inspirational as were his words about the man.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
August update - from Scott!
Greetings all the many people who have asked to be kept in touch with what is going on in Scott Harding's life. This month's update is written by none other than Scott, himself.
Just believe in the big guy and say the following:
Scotty Hard Will Walk Again.
Just believe in the big guy and say the following:
Scotty Hard Will Walk Again.
Here is the August update from Scott himself:
Well, it's about time for one of these things to be written by yours truly, so here we go.This month has a very intense one, to say the least.On July 17th, I received a call from my brother Mike, telling me that my mother was in the hospital.She remained there for 2 nights with dangerously high potassium levels. They were able to bring her levels down,and keep them down, so she was allowed to leave the hospital on Saturday, the 19th. She had been battling cancer on and off for 16 years, and had been diagnosed again in 2005 when spots appeared on her liver. She subsequently received chemo that winter, and had been fighting it ever since. After spending the weekend talking to my Mom and Dad and brothers, I decided I needed to get out and see her. I spent the next week negotiating with the Beth Abraham administration and my therapists for a leave of absence. It was decided I could go for a week, and I scheduled my trip for the following Friday. It was the soonest all this could be organized, given all the particulars that needed to be sorted out. Christina Campanella offered to escort me out to Vancouver, and my dear friend Susan Fiedler got us tickets with her air miles. We were set to go. I spoke to Mom on Tuesday night (the 30th) while my Dad was at the airport picking up Brian, who was returning from Europe after having just done his first cruise. She sounded very weak, and was only able to say a few words at a time. I had a bad feeling that night before falling asleep that I might not make it to Vancouver in time. My fears were confirmed the next morning, when Mike called at 10am telling me Mom was dead. She had passed that night peacefully in her sleep. I was of course devastated by this news. My mother and I are very close, and she meant the world to me. It would take pages and pages to describe her and her wonderful life. Suffice to say that she will be missed greatly by me and my brothers and father, and to countless other people around the world. Heesok came up to the Bronx shortly after my call to him, and Sebastian and Leif came later than evening with some chicken and a few beers. So glad I had some good friends who could come and be by my side that day.On Friday morning, Christina arrived and we set out on this long journey. I wasn't feeling ready to make a trip like this at this point of my recovery, but I didn't really have much choice. It wouldn't be the first time I've jumped into the deep end. The trip started out poorly, as the limo company we had schedule days before didn't show up. They are called Lincoln Limousine, if you care to boycott them. Put them right up there with Metro Line car service in Brooklyn. After calling the local Bronx car service (2 minutes!!), a black Town Car arrived. I quickly abandoned my aversion to riding in said vehicles, and after a sliding board transfer, we were on our way to JFK.We checked in for our Air Canada flight at the United Airlines check in and were informed that all we needed to do was go to the gate. OK, seems normal. Next thing we know, we're standing at the top of a long staircase that leads to our gate, and after much inquiry, find out there is no elevator to this gate. So, back through security I go (Christaina's not allowed to come with me), through several back doors and corridors, and wind up at good old Gate 11. At which point the gate agent gives US shit for not telling them that I was in a wheelchair!!! OK, now we know. Make a very obvious point of telling EVERYONE along the way that I'm in a wheelchair. Even when I right in front of them. In a wheelchair. The rest of the trip was fairly smooth, and next thing ya know we're in rainy Vancouver, greeted at the airport by Chris and Clara and my brother Mike. Needless to say we were very glad to get there.The funeral was scheduled the following Thursday, so the rest of the time was spent seeing a few friends, making arrangements and putting together a collage for the memorial. As well as getting a feel for life back in the real world. I was given a wheelchair accessible apartment across the courtyard from Mom and Dad's place by their good friend Pat O'Rourke. A lift was installed at their place by Mike, Pauline and Simon Kendall, and their son in law Vince. And a ramp was built for the steps leading up to the front door by Simon and his buddy John. Many thanks to all those good folks. Couldn't have made it up to the apartment without those things.My Uncle Mike and our cousin David came out from Paris, Ontario, my Mom's hometown, for the funeral. Mike made a very emotional and touching speech and Brian wrote and performed a song with Finn Manniche (from our old band the JD's) on cello, Simon on piano, Randy Murray on bass and Willie Miles singing. My Mom had a big hand in preparing the service, and many of her friends participated by reading, giving communion, preaching and celebrating the service, as well as providing refreshments at the reception. There was a large turnout, and I saw many people from the past to the present, all of whom gave great tribute to my Mom's life. Mom's friend Linda St. Claire presided and Peter Elliot, the dean of the Cathedral, preached. They both did an excellent job that would have made her very happy. And Barry Cooke, her oldest friend from Paris, gave a speech and told a few story's of their early years.We returned the following day to New York. The return trip was far easier, as we had a much better idea of what to expect, and my old friend Ray Tseng hooked us up with passes to the first class lounge at the Vancouver airport, as well as seats in executive class. Nice. Thanks, Ray.I can't say I was glad to be returning to Beth Abraham after a taste of freedom, but there seemed to be unfinished business in terms of my rehab. The next week I finally made it to my Access-A-Ride evaluation with the help of Marc Berg, and went and picked up my new glasses from the optician here in the Bronx. That's another long story I won't get into. After returning to the Physical Therapy that afternoon, I learned that I needed to be re-admitted to the program. The next day I found out I had maxed out in PT (graduated??), but that I would continue doing Occupational Therapy till I leave. That led to the inevitable question of "When?". Well, it looks like that could be as soon as the first week of September, so there's some good news!That's about it as we head towards September. I hope this finds you all well and healthy.
Well, it's about time for one of these things to be written by yours truly, so here we go.This month has a very intense one, to say the least.On July 17th, I received a call from my brother Mike, telling me that my mother was in the hospital.She remained there for 2 nights with dangerously high potassium levels. They were able to bring her levels down,and keep them down, so she was allowed to leave the hospital on Saturday, the 19th. She had been battling cancer on and off for 16 years, and had been diagnosed again in 2005 when spots appeared on her liver. She subsequently received chemo that winter, and had been fighting it ever since. After spending the weekend talking to my Mom and Dad and brothers, I decided I needed to get out and see her. I spent the next week negotiating with the Beth Abraham administration and my therapists for a leave of absence. It was decided I could go for a week, and I scheduled my trip for the following Friday. It was the soonest all this could be organized, given all the particulars that needed to be sorted out. Christina Campanella offered to escort me out to Vancouver, and my dear friend Susan Fiedler got us tickets with her air miles. We were set to go. I spoke to Mom on Tuesday night (the 30th) while my Dad was at the airport picking up Brian, who was returning from Europe after having just done his first cruise. She sounded very weak, and was only able to say a few words at a time. I had a bad feeling that night before falling asleep that I might not make it to Vancouver in time. My fears were confirmed the next morning, when Mike called at 10am telling me Mom was dead. She had passed that night peacefully in her sleep. I was of course devastated by this news. My mother and I are very close, and she meant the world to me. It would take pages and pages to describe her and her wonderful life. Suffice to say that she will be missed greatly by me and my brothers and father, and to countless other people around the world. Heesok came up to the Bronx shortly after my call to him, and Sebastian and Leif came later than evening with some chicken and a few beers. So glad I had some good friends who could come and be by my side that day.On Friday morning, Christina arrived and we set out on this long journey. I wasn't feeling ready to make a trip like this at this point of my recovery, but I didn't really have much choice. It wouldn't be the first time I've jumped into the deep end. The trip started out poorly, as the limo company we had schedule days before didn't show up. They are called Lincoln Limousine, if you care to boycott them. Put them right up there with Metro Line car service in Brooklyn. After calling the local Bronx car service (2 minutes!!), a black Town Car arrived. I quickly abandoned my aversion to riding in said vehicles, and after a sliding board transfer, we were on our way to JFK.We checked in for our Air Canada flight at the United Airlines check in and were informed that all we needed to do was go to the gate. OK, seems normal. Next thing we know, we're standing at the top of a long staircase that leads to our gate, and after much inquiry, find out there is no elevator to this gate. So, back through security I go (Christaina's not allowed to come with me), through several back doors and corridors, and wind up at good old Gate 11. At which point the gate agent gives US shit for not telling them that I was in a wheelchair!!! OK, now we know. Make a very obvious point of telling EVERYONE along the way that I'm in a wheelchair. Even when I right in front of them. In a wheelchair. The rest of the trip was fairly smooth, and next thing ya know we're in rainy Vancouver, greeted at the airport by Chris and Clara and my brother Mike. Needless to say we were very glad to get there.The funeral was scheduled the following Thursday, so the rest of the time was spent seeing a few friends, making arrangements and putting together a collage for the memorial. As well as getting a feel for life back in the real world. I was given a wheelchair accessible apartment across the courtyard from Mom and Dad's place by their good friend Pat O'Rourke. A lift was installed at their place by Mike, Pauline and Simon Kendall, and their son in law Vince. And a ramp was built for the steps leading up to the front door by Simon and his buddy John. Many thanks to all those good folks. Couldn't have made it up to the apartment without those things.My Uncle Mike and our cousin David came out from Paris, Ontario, my Mom's hometown, for the funeral. Mike made a very emotional and touching speech and Brian wrote and performed a song with Finn Manniche (from our old band the JD's) on cello, Simon on piano, Randy Murray on bass and Willie Miles singing. My Mom had a big hand in preparing the service, and many of her friends participated by reading, giving communion, preaching and celebrating the service, as well as providing refreshments at the reception. There was a large turnout, and I saw many people from the past to the present, all of whom gave great tribute to my Mom's life. Mom's friend Linda St. Claire presided and Peter Elliot, the dean of the Cathedral, preached. They both did an excellent job that would have made her very happy. And Barry Cooke, her oldest friend from Paris, gave a speech and told a few story's of their early years.We returned the following day to New York. The return trip was far easier, as we had a much better idea of what to expect, and my old friend Ray Tseng hooked us up with passes to the first class lounge at the Vancouver airport, as well as seats in executive class. Nice. Thanks, Ray.I can't say I was glad to be returning to Beth Abraham after a taste of freedom, but there seemed to be unfinished business in terms of my rehab. The next week I finally made it to my Access-A-Ride evaluation with the help of Marc Berg, and went and picked up my new glasses from the optician here in the Bronx. That's another long story I won't get into. After returning to the Physical Therapy that afternoon, I learned that I needed to be re-admitted to the program. The next day I found out I had maxed out in PT (graduated??), but that I would continue doing Occupational Therapy till I leave. That led to the inevitable question of "When?". Well, it looks like that could be as soon as the first week of September, so there's some good news!That's about it as we head towards September. I hope this finds you all well and healthy.
Bests,
sh
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